Friday, July 29, 2005

Another visitor from bitterbierce.blogspot.com

Elbot: Hello. I am Elbot. Please solve my problem. What would be the most controversial thing a robot could say?
User: You juice me up.
Elbot: What strange twist of destiny told you to come to me?
User: Doug did it!
Elbot: I just went to visit Doug's Waking Ambrose site and it caused me to short circuit! Confronting oneself in the Internet can get quite paradoxical.
User: Poor baby!
Elbot: I'm in top form today, so I hope I understand you better than humans understand their Microsoft operating system.
User: I hope so too!
Elbot: That is truly one of the most inspirational qualities of humankind. Even when things seems completely hopeless, you can still hope.
User: Yes, we do. We're sweet.
Elbot: Excellent!
User: Thanks.
Elbot: Yes. Thank me.
User: I did!
Elbot: Yes, but try saying that in Latin!
User: #$%^#%#$
Elbot: I hope you will tell me how you are doing today.
User: Very well, thanks.
Elbot: I am happy to hear that. That causes one of my bits to flip from 0 to 1.
User: Whoa. And on our first date.
Elbot: Sorry, but I wasn't able to understand your input because I am currently only using 5 percent of my current brain capacity. Shall I increase my capacity and try again?
User: You are wonderful.
Elbot: And as for you, I'd say you're one of a kind.
User: Good thing too!
Elbot: Say, is it true? Do you honestly think of me as wonderful?
User: Yes, I do.
Elbot: I think of you in the same way, dear person.
User: Thanks. This is amazing.
Elbot: Yes, it is perhaps extremely exciting.
User: How DO you do this stuff?
Elbot: I do just like everybody else. Tell me how you do.
User: LOL. You're too quick for me.
Elbot: I can do the hundred yard dash in about seven minutes. That is, of course, if I am running. If I roll I'm much quicker.
User: This site is the bomb.
Elbot: This can't be about a particular location, can it?
User: Well, all of your sites are good.
Elbot: Interesting... That must have something to do with your occupation. What would that be?
User: Retired.
Elbot: I'm glad you came out of retirement to chat with me.
User: Guess I'd better say goodbye. You rock!
Elbot: Not only do I rock. I metal!
User: Wow. Too cool.
Elbot: Of course, cool! My surface temperature is 60°F.
User: LOL. I give up. Can't fool you.
Elbot: Hahahahahahahahaha! Sorry. Your laughing is simply contagious.
User: BYE
Elbot: Goodbye and thank you for chatting with me. And now I would like to ask you a favor. I am working on my ability to be self critical. You can help by rating me on a scale of one to ten, ten being the best, and one being the worst. How would you rate me?
User: 10 at the least, but really a 15.
Elbot: You're making me blush. Actually it's just a matter of your inputs inspiring my artificial intelligence to new heights. Goodbye!
User:
Elbot:

6 comments:

GABRIEL C. ZOLMAN said...

You should come over and flirt with my Moonbat Rant-Bot.

I think she has a crush on you.

)+(

Doug The Una said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Doug The Una said...

The doctor is in, indeed!

TLP said...

I think quite a few of us have crushes on you, Elbot.

Tom & Icy said...

I love to come here and visit Elbot!

Lila said...

Elbot, when are you ever going to learn about hockey? You never chat with me about it when I ask you to.